Jill Sirota — Psychoanalyst & Psychotherapist

You may recognize yourself here

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You've tried to think your way through it

You're intelligent and self-aware. You understand the patterns intellectually. But understanding them hasn't changed them — and you're tired of insight that doesn't move.

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The same things keep happening

In your relationships, your work, your inner life — certain dynamics recur. Different circumstances, same feelings. You sense the repeated experience has an earlier source — somewhere you haven't yet been able to reach.

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You want more than strategies

You may have tried therapy before. The tools helped, somewhat. But you're not looking for coping strategies — you want a different relationship with yourself.

Who I work with

Who this work is for

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Curious about your inner life

This work tends to fit if you want to understand what drives you, not only manage symptoms. You may be thoughtful and self-aware, and still find that thinking hasn't been enough. I work with adults of any age and background. What matters most is a willingness to be curious, and to stay with the process long enough for something to shift.

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Symptoms carry meaning

Anxiety, procrastination, avoidance, and self-doubt can feel like problems to get rid of. In psychoanalytic therapy, we also ask what they are doing for you. A symptom is often a solution, or a compromise, between competing parts of the mind: an unconscious wish, belief, or conflict. As we understand what a symptom protects you from, it often loosens its hold. Understanding how earlier experiences shape your present is not about reliving the past, but about reclaiming your authentic desire.

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What brings people in

Many people come with anxiety, depression, self-criticism, or a lack of feeling fulfilled. Others notice relationship patterns that play out the same way, difficulty with a career or life transition, or the stresses of parenting. Some come with grief, loss, or a wish to deal with past trauma in a space where you are never pushed faster than you are ready to go.

The approach

Therapy that works with your awareness — and beyond it

I practice relational psychoanalytic psychotherapy — a depth approach that works with what's happening beneath conscious awareness: the unconscious patterns, the early relational experiences, the ways the past lives on in the present. This isn't symptom management. It's genuine change.

This kind of work asks something real of you. It requires showing up consistently, tolerating uncertainty, and being willing to encounter parts of yourself that may be uncomfortable or unfamiliar. The therapeutic relationship itself becomes the instrument — what happens between us in the room is where the real work takes place.

Most of my patients come weekly. As the work deepens, many find twice-weekly sessions allow something genuinely different to develop.

What is psychoanalytic psychotherapy?

An initial consultation

We begin with a 45-minute first session — unhurried, exploratory. You're getting to know me as much as I'm getting to know you. There's no pressure to decide anything that session.

Regular, consistent sessions

Depth work happens over time, in a relationship built through repeated contact. Consistency isn't just logistical — it's structural to the process itself.

Following what's alive

We may start with anxiety, a relationship question, or a career transition. But we follow whatever surfaces — what recurs, what surprises you, what you've never quite put into words.

Change that holds

Lasting change isn't about acquiring new strategies. It's about something shifting at the level of who you are — in what you can feel, tolerate, and desire. Making the unconscious conscious is what frees us to live more fully.

The underlying belief

Why psychoanalytic psychotherapy is different

The parts of us that create the most suffering are often the parts we understand the least — not because we haven't thought about them, but because they live outside of thinking.

Relational psychoanalytic therapy works with what cognitive approaches can't always reach: the relational patterns laid down before we had words for them, the ways anxiety becomes organized in the body and nervous system, the unconscious meanings we make of our experience. Many people find that thinking harder doesn't resolve the problem. The work invites a different kind of knowing — slower, less linear, and ultimately more durable.

Is this the right fit?

This work tends to fit well if…

✦You're genuinely curious about yourself — not just about fixing symptoms, but about understanding what drives you and why you are the way you are

✦Anxiety, depression, or self-doubt have followed you across different jobs, relationships, and life stages

✦You sense that something significant happened earlier in your life that still shapes you — even if you can't quite name it

✦You're at a turning point — a major transition, a relationship question, a growing feeling that the life you've built isn't fully yours

✦You've had therapy before and felt it stayed too surface — you want a relationship and a process that can hold more

✦You're ready to invest real time and attention in this process — and you're willing to stay with the discomfort long enough for something to shift

To consider if this could help

Schedule a consultation

About

Jill Sirota, LCSW

I'm a licensed psychotherapist in private practice in Merrick, NY. I work with adults who want more than symptom relief — people who are ready to understand themselves at a deeper level and change the patterns that have been shaping their lives.

My training is in psychoanalysis and psychoanalytic psychotherapy, which means I bring attention not only to what you bring to our sessions, but to what emerges between us — the subtle relational dynamics that often carry the most important material.

I find this work most alive with patients who are genuinely curious — about their inner life, about what happens in the room, about why they are the way they are. That curiosity, more than anything else, is what makes depth work possible.

Training & credentials

Education MSW · Boston University
BA · University of Michigan

Licensure New York (LCSW) · Rhode Island (ICSW) · Florida (Certified Telehealth)

Psychoanalytic training Suffolk Institute for Psychotherapy and Psychoanalysis

Practice Private practice · Merrick, NY
Telehealth in RI and FL

Practice details Private pay · Superbill provided for out-of-network reimbursement

Common questions

Frequently asked questions

How is psychoanalytic therapy different from other types of therapy?

Many approaches focus on managing symptoms — tools and strategies for the here and now. Psychoanalytic therapy works differently: it looks at the unconscious patterns, early relational experiences, and recurring dynamics that generate those symptoms in the first place. Instead of only treating what's on the surface, we work to understand why it's there. The therapeutic relationship itself becomes part of the process — what happens between us often reveals as much as what you tell me directly.

What can I expect in a typical session?

There's no fixed agenda. You bring whatever is on your mind — a dream, a conflict, a feeling you can't quite name — and we follow it together, wherever it leads. Over time, certain patterns and themes tend to emerge, and that repetition is often where the real material lives. It's a less linear process than structured therapies, but one that tends to go deeper and last longer.

How long does this kind of work take?

Many people find some relief just by beginning this process, and as they come to understand lesser-known sides of themselves, they find their life expanding in ways they may not have expected. Psychoanalytic work can be a longer commitment than other therapies, but it aims deeper. We will work together to understand your personal experiences, strengths, coping style, and relational patterns. As trust in the process develops, what has been unconscious can become conscious. The pace at which this occurs is unique to each person and his or her goals for therapy.

How often will we meet?

My patients attend sessions weekly. As the work deepens, some move to twice-weekly sessions, which often allows something genuinely different to develop in the process. Consistency isn't just a logistical detail here — it's structural to how this kind of therapy works.

I've tried therapy before and it didn't really help — how is this different?

This is one of the most common reasons people reach out to me. Many patients arrive having tried therapy that gave them useful tools or coping strategies, but didn't change the underlying patterns — so the same issues kept resurfacing in new forms. Depth work goes beneath the coping layer to the patterns themselves, which is part of why it tends to produce change that holds.

What happens in the first consultation?

We begin with a 45-minute first session, unhurried and exploratory. You're getting to know me as much as I'm getting to know you, and there's no pressure to decide anything in that first session. It's a chance to talk about what's bringing you in and get a sense of whether this kind of work feels right for you.

Do you accept insurance?

This is a private pay practice, and I'm out-of-network with all insurance plans. I provide a superbill that you can submit to your insurer for possible out-of-network reimbursement — check with your plan directly, since reimbursement rates and requirements vary.

Is telehealth as effective as in-person sessions?

For most patients, yes. I offer both in-person sessions in Merrick, NY, and telehealth across New York, Rhode Island, and Florida. What matters most for this kind of work is the consistency of the relationship and the space we build together — many patients find that holds just as well over video as it does in the room.

Begin

The first step is simply a conversation

Reach out to schedule a first session. We can talk about what's bringing you in, what you're looking for, and whether this kind of work feels like a good fit for you.

Something in you keeps asking to be known.